Thursday, May 5, 2011

Shave your Balls, not your Face!

I can't imagine what it'd be like to have the sex-drive of a guy.

I was watching something on TV about a trans person... and he was talking about how crazy it is to experience the male sex drive all of a sudden. With all the testosterone shots, you probably do see it spike like crazy. And to be able to compare to before... that must be quite an experience.

I've talked a lot about women in porn, and exploitation, etc. But what about men in porn... its gotta be freakin' hard (pun intended :P) to maintain an erection for all those hours. And if it involves meds... taking viagra all the time, that can't be good for your health.

I suppose this applies to both genders, but what about desensitization? If you're thrusting in and out 5 days a week from 9-5 (im sure its not such regular hours, but still) surely, bringing your 'work' home with you is bound to make you a little less than enthusiastic. How on earth do they maintain the same (or any) enthusiasm for sex in their free time. Getting aroused in real life situations has gotta be tough for experienced porn stars...

And oh the hypocrisy..especially when it comes to guys. There are way too many holier than thou Pakistani men, that look down on women for having a sexual appetite, yet all they fantasize about is porn type situations. I have known several myself..."good" family men (supposedly), religious, go-to-the-mosque-to-pray types, but yet they're the perviest fucks out there. These are the guys with large porn collections...the ones that cant stop thinking about sex, and fantasizing about blondes with fake boobs. People tell me about Rainbow centre (the market that sells porn in Karachi), supposedly a large portion of the people buying and selling these movies are bearded. Really. Why project that image of yourself, when you're clearly going against your own beliefs. I never get that. How do people exist lying to themselves?

Speaking of beards (it seems to have become a fascination of mine lately, just the mindset that comes with projecting that 'religious' bearded image of yourself...), via Twitter, I got to see a video of "religious" men protesting a Gillette shaving event in Pakistan. I mean, FFS.. this kind of thing never fails to shock me. Like REALLY, do they have nothing better to protest than corporate events promoting Razors? There's gotta be something more worthwhile than that, even in their pea sized brains... Blaargh...

Correct me if im wrong, but according to Islam, aren't u supposed to keep things well groomed in the nether regions? If that's the case.... why is face shaving even an issue for these weirdos...thats hardly logical...but then again, religion begins to unravel if u look at it too logically..

Is the take away message here...shave your balls but not your face? It seems the fundies want your face to look less groomed than your crotch. That explains a lot actually. Wtf kind of world are we living in...


My Male interviewees share their thoughts on Porn:

Fahad, Male, 24

Wow that is a pretty loaded question. Not sure where to start…I guess the first thing I’ll say is that I’m not anti-pornography. I feel that it’s something very personal and rather than be banned and hated, it should just be accepted as part of society. Unfortunately it’s shunned in every single society in the world, and that leads to a lot of abuses in the industry – such as drug abuse and violence. Another unfortunate consequence of porn being shunned by society is how it influences young minds. For me personally, it was great to answer any questions I had about sex when I was a kid. I guess I was able to take everything with a grain of salt and not believe that every woman begs for cum on her face! Benefit of taking sex-ed in school! Unfortunately, I’ve known many guys in our culture who think that porn (the mainstream kind) depicts what sex must be like. I’ve known guys that think anal sex is a common and regular part of sexual intercourse because it’s so frequently portrayed in porn.

In Pakistan, I think there really needs to be a porn industry. We’re such a closed society and watching western porn doesn’t do us any good. I think it would be great to have Pakistani porn actors and actresses so that the folks who’re wanking off to it can actually relate. I’ve seen some desi porn but unfortunately it’s not too appealing as it usually involves a shalwar and a shaky camera!!

Sultan, Male, 19

I think as long as porn exists, then sex turns into a market. I’m sure even if they manage to eliminate pornography, there will always be a market for sex. But I don’t think it should be encouraged in anyway because it fucks people’s lives up – a porn star I think, is a soulless person. They sell something that’s so personal to the whole world. Man is an evil creature; there will always be a market for it.

When asked if he blames the porn stars themselves he says,

No, they are just very intellectually inferior people that are just finding another way to get rich. I don’t think pornography corrupts anyone as such but I think porn stars fuck themselves up just to make pornography and I think its bad only for them, not for anyone else.

Khizer, Male, 26

Its just porn man, looking through a porn magazine is like looking through a car magazine, yeah it’s a stimulant. But some people do have an issue with it – anything can affect your life, you can be addicted to carbonated cola and that could affect your life. As far as porn addiction is concerned you could become kind of a hermit, you’re stuck in one room with your porn. You won’t grow mentally or socially or in any way.

Imad, Male, 25

Pornography is something that exists. It’s there for a particular purpose. Just like a lot of other things are there for a particular purpose. Nothings wrong with it. Pornography goes such a long way back…I don’t think there is anything wrong with it technically.

Qasim, Male, 26

Porn is not for me....if nudity is done in a tasteful way... then yes I have no problem with it.. if it’s part of something else.. I’m not one to sit there and watch porn .. but I watch a lot of shows that people would consider to be soft core porn. to me porn is quite cheap.

Ali, Male, 29

I think at times porn’s good... but I think you should not make it a habit everyday.. it’s good once a month.. or twice in 2 months.. but you should not let yourself get addicted... .


  1. Male porn actors don't take viagra or such, they literally inject themselves (needle and all) with stuff to maintain the erection for long periods of time. Don't remember what it was, but definitely a liquid he injected just like other intramuscular injection. Once saw a documentary on the porn industry, it wasn't explicit, but interviews with the actors, directors, cameraman, fluffer, everybody were enlightening, yet disturbing.

  2. Your blog has a lot of potential. Please do not take this the wrong way, but why do you use so many internet short-hand words(lol, u etc.)? Those are somewhat are the gratuitous ellipses. I wish you could use a more academic tone.

  3. @ Anon 8:36 - I write in a more formal tone for a living. It's not something I'd want to do in my free time. I'm glad u think my blog has a lot of 'potential' lol :P But unfortunately my writing style isn't going to change, there are plenty of 'academically written' blogs out there for you to enjoy. You may even want to stick to newspapers if the whole casual thing gets to you ;) Plus, im often put off by super pretentious writing.

    btw, dad - is that you :P

  4. I Like the way you write, it's much more relaxed and conversational than formal writing.

    Conscientious porn-watching guys! That's interesting. I like Fahad's suggestion for properly made local porn, there needs to be more stuff that people here can relate to. Nor do I think that would be too hard to create.

  5. Thanks Shumaila, I'm glad u like the writing :) Im a firm believer in 'The medium is the message' and certain topics, in certain contexts need to be written in a particular way for a particular reason. I want this blog to be accessible to all sorts of people, just recently i received an interview from someone whose english isn't the strongest, and in my eyes thats the kind of insight thats hard to get... if I stuck to a more formal tone, it would alienate such readers. Plus, I don't think blog posts with titles like "shave ur balls not ur face" and "go fuck urself" would go with a 'more academic' tone...

    And yea, I agree, Fahad's suggestion was definitely an interesting one...

  6. Your blog is pretty good but the useless swearing and lack of grammar+internet slang can get tiresome at times.

    There is a way to write casually(without swearing and slang)and not come across as too formal/pretentious =)

  7. For fucks sake; This blog isn't about dissecting my english language skills. Or how much I swear. Thats just not the subject matter here. If you have something relevant to say, i'd love to hear it. Otherwise, if its so tiresome, i don't see why you need to keep reading and exhausting yourself.. There is this typical Pakistani complex about writing and speaking english, 'the proper way' a little preachy. Just as 'tiresome' as religiously preachy people. But perhaps it lingers from the days of colonialism where some of us tried so hard to prove we could fit in with the goras, that we could read and write just like them, just as well... its ridiculous. Get over it. I can write just fine thank you. I wouldnt be hired by multi-national companies to write if i couldnt. But what i do in my time off, and however much i swear... is my business.

    Perhaps you should start your own blog and take care of all your grammatical needs there :)

  8. Wow, just trying to give some constructive criticism. You don't have to take it that personally - I never said you couldn't speak proper English.

    My point was that too much of something detracts from the good aspects of the blog. This is a different anon that posted the original comment.

    I'm not saying an academic tone is needed - I'm saying that swearing and the use of too many internet acronyms lessens the excellent quality of your blog and was just asking you to tone it down a bit.

    I don't know how you managed to pull out that analogy from absolutely nowhere. Most people in the English speaking world like people to speak correctly - not just 'preachy pakis that want to be gora'. It's about learning things the proper way rather than going about it in a half-hearted manner. I would rather take the hit and be corrected than keep making mistakes. This applies to all languages not just 'that pesky colonial language'. It's an extremely ridiculous argument to make : 'Oh you just speak proper English because you want to be a gora and fit in'

    My main point was just asking you to reduce the slang/profanity whilst still remaining casual. There is nothing preachy about it - I was just giving some helpful advice. There's no need to rage :P

  9. Thats just it anonymous person, why do you think i'd tone it down? This is not a 'I'll- write-however-you-ask-me-to-blog'

    helpful advice thats on topic would be welcomed with open arms. Otherwise its not really helpful.

    Nothing about this subject should be toned down in my opinion, and neither should the language. The analogy is pretty true, you'd realise it if you stepped back a bit from the tea and crumpets/samosas. Sure, there's a time and place for reading and writing in an 'official' manner. Im not trying to teach people english here, so my writing style is irrelevant. Especially if my message comes across.

    It's an extremely ridiculous argument to make : 'Oh you just speak proper English because you want to be a gora and fit in'

    its really not, especially given the history of our country.

    Try going to school elsewhere in the english speaking world and then go to school in Pakistan, how hard people try is blatantly obvious. Its not necessarily a bad thing, but its just that there is a specific style there, especially in terms of writing. When it leads to people thinking there is only one way to get a message accross .. thats when it boggles my mind.

    This 'tone it down' attitude in Pakistan is what lies at the root of our repression. Why must we want people to tone everything down?

    Of all the things that could bother u on this blog, its the writing style... really.. :P

    And there is no raging, just retort. Plenty of academic studies on sexuality out there. For those of you who are put off by this, go forth and google :)

  10. Sorry Anon but I have to agree with Eiynah on this. As a people, we always seem to be more concerned with how we can 'improve' them rather than accept what is and enjoy it. To me, a blog is one of the most informal forms of writing and should definitely have a more casual approach. Besides, the goal of the writer seems to be to reach out to as large a population of pakistanis so they can start thinking about sexuality and its role in our society. In order to do that, its probably best to be casual and even use some profanity.

    This conversation in the comments section reminds me about what's so frustrating about maulvis like the one in the video. When I saw the video, I could barely understand the guy! Lol these uber-religious fundos love using complicated language - they probably feel they're so much better than everyone else by doing that.

  11. Again - you can be casual and simple without swearing. I'm all for coming across in an informal and easily accessible manner. It's the swearing that devalues this great blog and makes aspects of it seem crass.

    I never said I was against coming across casually and writing in a simple manner. I am in favour of this in order to get across the message.

    Inability to accept constructive criticism and denial are a huge part of our society unfortunately.

  12. Lol I thought constructive criticism had to be fucking constructive? This obsession with fucking writing style doesn't seem very fucking constructive to me.

    Personally, I fucking love the motherfucking swearing! ;)

  13. Hahaha you're so funny and witty.

    I seriously can't stop laughing !

    Oh my days - where did you get such a great sense of humour ?

    You are like the funniest and most intelligent person ever !

  14. LOL I always love these crits on writing styles and swearing by oh-so-well meaning "anon"s. SO off-point.
    Awesome blog btw! It's abt time we started a dialogue thats honest,accessible, conversational and ofcourse with a healthy does of profanity. Looking forward to reading it.

  15. Anon 12:11 - ok last time im responding to you, a) because u don't even have the balls to make up a fake name, so you can at least be identified as a repeat commenter, and b) because you're not saying anything useful. Motif definitely has a point about your 'constructive' criticism not being constructive in the least. If you don't like swearing, that is known as a "personal preference" , and its not something you can change on someone else's blog.

    @Inspirationalladdu - awesome name btw! welcome, and lol, thanks for not being anonymous :P Yup, off-point completely...which is my main issue with this 'anons' comments...they just serve no useful purpose. *shrug* Hope to hear from u again, glad u can handle profanity ;) (Most big kids can...)

  16. Ok Madame in future i will take care. Many thanx for teaching how to enter name/url which i never knew since 1998 the year i learned how to use net & cyberworld.

  17. Thanks N.J. , much appreciated!

  18. Ha ha ha. I really had a great time reading this entertaining blog on a topic which is really close to everyone's heart but they always keep it under wraps for fear of being caught or ridiculed. First of all I just love your style of writing. There is a flow which keeps you glued. Although I do not use profanity or slang in my writing I enjoy such writing by others. Kudos to you Eivnah or should i call you Nice Mangoes? Well the mangoes are really nice, tasty, juicy and delicious.

    Pornography is a punishable offense in most countries, though watching pornography is not. Transmitting porn and juvenile porn is mostly an offense. In addition if you try to show porn to a girl it can be construed as an offense. You can watch pornography in the confines of your home to your heart's content. I for one love to watch porn and I do not feel guilty about it. I sometimes watch porn with my wife too. She does not mind my watching porn. i do have a lot of porn on my computer but i have to maintain a separate user duly password protected so that it is not accessible to the children. I often masturbate too while watching porn, specially when i am alone. When i and my wife watch porn together we have sex.

    Porn is an art form. The way they do it in different poses is artistic. The angle of the camera and the way the movements are captured can make it really interesting. Although the western porn is done more artistically, I love desi porn a lot as you can identify with the characters. You feel that they are a part of you. Amateur porn too is very absorbing as you feel that it depicts you.

    I enjoyed reading all the comments and had a good laugh at the comments where people were trying to ask you to improve your English. ha ha ha they are such losers. They should be more interested in the aaaahs and the ouchs and the ins and outs of porn rather than a class of English grammar.

    I just love your writing style and I have become a fan of yours.

  19. thank you for ur kind words Grand master :)